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I had just gotten back to the city I was born and raised in (Dubai) two months prior to talking to her. God, I was so happy to be 'home' and to see all my friends and chill. Everything was like old times! So my best friend and I were pranksters and trolls back then, so in any way we could mess with people innocently we thought that it'd be fun. The app we were using was called 'Skout' maybe some of you have heard of it.
One day, it was just a normal day. Going on Skout messing with some people we found extremely strange (this is the internet there's a lot of weird comments out there). I was planning on going out with my other friend group, a bunch of guys who study in Canada but were visiting back during their vacation. That same night I spoke to this one girl. It was the random pairing option and the app paired us together. Apparently she was on there looking for a celebrity she heard was on the app, anyhow we started talking and I thought she was hilarious. We spoke about how weird people are on the application, and she was on vacation in Spain at the time even though she lived in Germany then. We said our goodbyes because I had to go see my friends, as far as I was thinking this girl was just gonna be another one of the strangers I talk to for a few days to 2 weeks max and then they disappear.
The days turned into sleepless nights where we'd stay up and talk all night. Until my 5 am and her 3 am (My timezone was 2 hours ahead). We'd been talking all day! This went on for a few weeks and I didn't know why but every single day I wanted to speak to her. From the moment I woke up to the moment I slept I just couldn't get enough of her, she felt the same way about me. Our innocents talks turned to innocent flirts, but we had both agreed that long distance is plain stupid (we never talked about dating at this point) but it came up in the conversation due to a different person.
She was getting really into me, eventually after a month or so of non-stop texting (we texted each other everyday). She wanted more, she told me to get on Skype. I was extremely WORRIED.
'What if it doesn't go well? I've never spoken on Skype to her before!' So I kept coming up with excuses, really lame excuses to why I can't Skype. But she was so persistent, and growing impatient at the end I couldn't say no. But, I brought my best friend on the call in case it was awkward so I can leave with an excuse. But it wasn't. It was so much fun talking to her and so natural, and so cute (For once I'm smiling while writing this :]) I asked my friend to leave and he did, we ended up talking for much longer. I don't remember exactly how long but it was well over an hour.
So, her and I, and my best friend occasionally we ended up talking all the time through Skype (no video at this point) for a while. It was always so much fun and a pleasure to speak to her. I swear to God guys this girl was so special, I don't even know but I was hooked. All my friends liked her, she was hilarious and in a group chat with us so we all talked all the time.
Eventually, my best friend said 'Why don't you guys video chat! Come on do it now!' We decided we would. I didn't want my family to disturb me while I speak to her so I decided to go to the balcony and video chat her from there. Man... She looked so beautiful, I still remember and we spoke for long. It was such a long time ago that I don't remember exactly, but it was special. We flirted innocently and spoke every single day (Not a day has gone by since we spoke for the first time on 'Skout' that we didn't speak). We both thought the other was good looking, but you know... Long distance is stupid. So we never pursued anything.
Eventually we kept talking.. and talking and we have this one mutual friend (my other best friend I have 2 who I consider brothers my world would be different without them). We were a group chat of 4 people on Whatsapp. So the 3 of us decided to play a joke on the best friend that played a less significant story in this. She would tell him he's bro-zoned and we all thought it was hilarious. This led to a talk between me and her. She asked me if I'd like to be friend zoned with her. I said no, that I like her more than a friend.
Have you ever had that kind of talk with someone you've been crushing on for so long? The butterflies... the feelings my god it was beautiful. So that night we had the talk about long distance, it being too hard etc... and we got together we decided we'll try because we really like each other. Every night was such a beautiful night. I'd tell her she was my princess she'd blush, she'd tell me I'm handsome. The first time she ever got upset with me was when she told me what if it doesn't work? I told her you have to try don't go into it telling me it won't work then that's a waste of my time. She got so mad at me. But she had a Gorgeous voice, beautiful Spanish accent, but it was unique with her she didn't sound like the rest of Spanish girls. So she told me to shut up. It was funny, in the cutest and heart-melting way you can imagine so I copied her over and over.. and over in a playful way and she ended up uncontrollably laughing. :).
We spent the next 3 months sleeping 'together' every night. We'd keep Skype on everyday together and sleep. After so long of this. We still talked every single day btw. We eventually fell in love. But I was so scared to tell her I love her, and she didn't want to tell me yet either. That our 'I love you' was 'I adore you.' For both of us when we were typing that we'd have to erase love to switch to adore so we don't say love. Even when we were talking sometimes I'd have to hold my tongue to remember to say adore. One day though, I just quickly (and unintentionally) said, I love you after speaking to her on Skype. I was so embarrassed... Her face lit up though!
Fast forward to New Years Eve, I had just gotten back from watching the fireworks at Burj Khalifa in Dubai. She's 2 hours behind, so I get a message past midnight of her professing my love to me and telling me how special I am and etc... (I wish I still had that text but unfortunately I never saved it). I WAS SO HAPPY! I OF COURSE SAID IT BACK! hahaha.
Then on March 27 2014 I finally got a chance to go to Spain to see her. She was living in the Netherlands at the time though, she moved from Germany to there. She came to Spain for me as well. This was the first time I saw her in person. I stood across the street from the station of Atocha waiting for her. She walks to me with her brother, he's pointing at me asking, 'Is that him?'. I hear a girl scream like literally scream. She's jogging towards me 'my baby!' And she runs in for a kiss I try to dodge it though because her brother is right there and in my culture (I'm from Dubai duh) the brother usually gets mad at this kind of stuff. She tried again and finally kissed me. I can't even explain what that was like.
While she was running to me though, all I could think was how freaking beautiful she was. Her eyes were shining.. Shining blue! She was brunette and had really really long beautiful brown hair. She was dressed in a black leather jacket, blue jeans, carrying a huge typical woman shoulder bag. That entire day felt like magic. We spent 4 hours at the park laying near each other holding hands, talking, and etc... At the end of the day, she had to take me back to the train station. My grandma lived in Cordoba, So I took a train every 2 days to see her in Madrid (it was an expensive train and I also had to spend some time with my grandma). She took me to Bernabeu stadium, we made out everywhere we went. I met her mom and her mom is honestly the nicest person you'll ever see.
Alas, I had to leave Spain a day before my birthday which would be on April 4 (My 18 birthday). I had seen her a few times in my one week break. She gave me a gift of our recent pictures together as a memory which I still hold on to, I can't find the heart to throw it away.
We wen't back to skype calls and texting, and missed each other whole. But she was always unsure if she wanted to do long distance. Her first prom in her new school in the netherlands, was making her think of breaking up with me. We hadn't spoken like we use to and it was distant for a week. Eventually, I confronted her about it and told her it had upset me and she apologised and said she still wants me. She ended up taking her 2 best girl-friends to prom. Honestly, I feel so bad about this. I couldn't go see her. Tickets from Amsterdam to Dubai are so expensive, and I needed pocket money as well. Fast forward to June. My family is going to Venice and I really want to go (only because I really thought there might be a way I could see her) So I convinced her to come, I bought her the ticket and she was so nervous but she did it for me (without telling anyone because she was only 16 at the time its kind of crazy thinking of it now). She came for a weekend to spend it in Venice with me. That weekend was so fucking magical, at least in my head. The gondolas, museums, water, food, etc... I spent all day the day before she arrived looking for a place for her to stay, everything was full but eventually I found a decent 3 star guest house.
It was our first time getting intimate together. Completely naked Intimate while in Venice, but we didn't have sex.
Eventually that had to end as well and we went back to the usual part of the relationship. Skype, calls, texts, etc... Her dad found out she went to Venice secretly and he flipped. For some reason, he opened up to me later on (before having met me I guess after he saw how much his daughter liked me) he let her come to Dubai last August to see me. I convinced my family to let her stay with us. This is where the trouble started though.
They caught us taking a nap together on the couch (not a big deal I know but my sisters decided to tell my parents) she started crying and asking if she should leave earlier. My sister wanted us to leave the house at 8 am and come back later so we don;t stay in the house alone together (she got paranoid we'd have sex or something). I lived with my sister my parents lived in a different country. So I called my mom and told her of this and she spoke to my girlfriend, she was being so sweet and kind to her and my girlfriend felt good again. But tension was always there between us 2 and my sister.
Anyways eventually that ends better and she leaves back to Spain. Last October i decided to go visit her (I didn't tell anyone) and I went for 3 days. Her family were so kind to me. They treated me like a son. I stayed at her house (we ended up having sex for the first time ever in her room lol). After I got back from here that's where everything wen't down hill. We were arguing and insulting each other and then making up easily. But she became so mean to me whenever she got upset. Insults, after insult, and after insult. I eventually became like that too. She would shut the line on my face, telling me to leave her alone etc...
She called me a week before we broke up or almost 2 and told me that she was feeling distant. She had offended me (I honestly over reacted and insulted her back) Told my friend that she likes guys that stand up for themselves. So I asked, 'Am I one of those guys?' She says 'No, you're tame' her excuse was apparently because I don't stand up for my family. I got so upset after all the disrespect that's been piling up that I insulted her and told her if she doesn't respect me then I won't respect her. She almost broke up with me but I begged her not to because I was due to come in 8 days.
Over the course of the time we were dating I had to beg her multiple times btw not to break up with me after any kind of fight lol. I was supposed to visit her December 22 2015, her dad had bought me a ticket to visit because I bought her a ticket to Venice last summer.
I couldn't go my dad didn't let me, but since my dad didn't live in the same country I was defying him. I decided to go anyways. I got her gifts. I got her parents gifts for Christmas and I went to the airport on the day. But I got a call that talked me out of it. I'm only 18 at the time (19 now) I need my dad to help me financially and I need to be on good terms with him I can't be on bad terms with him I'm still a kid. So I missed the flight and told her, I was devastated though it waasn't easy for me I broke down in the middle of the airport. Next thing I know she tells my best friend to tell me to call her. She's crying upset, and wants to break up. I couldn't convince her not to she was set to do so for real this time.
So we ended up breaking up... She says its not my fault, that it was the distance, that she can't take it anylonger.. She tells my best friend to take care of me, and throughout the next few days talks to me to check if I'm ok and me checking if she's ok. She says its just about living in the same place.
You thought that was the most heart-breaking part? I sent her the SAT book by mail, that I promised I'd give her when I would have arrived in Spain since I couldn't go. I just felt like I had to make up for wasting all her money I felt so guilty and ashamed and regretful for missing the flight. Like I failed. I also sent her other gifts but Spain but taxes on it so she made me take it back because she didn't wanna pay the taxes. The sat book was clear though. I wrote a non-emotional note telling her good luck on studying for the sat.
A few days later she tells me 'I know this sounds mean, but I'm so glad we aren't dating anymore' My heart sank at this point. But anyways because I miss her I continue talking to her one time every week... then a few... then a month. She was a month and a half after the break up so nice to me it was like she was like my girlfriend again. Before that she had told my best friend to tell me to stop talking to her because it makes her uncomfortable. 'I have that need to speak to her and she doesn't.' So I was getting a lot of mixed signals from her. Eventually after she was nice to me, i said hi again and she was only answering me with one word or two and being cold so I stopped talking to her until her birthday.
I told her happy birthday and she said thanks. Then we wouldn't have talked until my birthday 8 days ago. I found out before my birthday that she's been on a few dates, and etc.. she went to the netherlands to see her old school where she'd hang out with her former friend (her now boyfriend.)
I guess that's the end of it right now. What I want to say guys is never take the girl for granted. I loved her with all my heart and soul, but I got comfortable and I wouldn't think. whenever she'd insult me I'd insult her back. (wrong but being a dumb teenager what do you expect) I'd never do that today if I got a second chance. Cherish her, and every moment.
Seeing her with this new guy (who took her to prom a few days ago at her old csool) made me feel like crap. I start to think that It just took her 3 months to get over me, damn I lost a lot, I miss her so much, it's my fault we broke up I wish I hadn't missed that flight.
I think shes in a long distance relationship with this guy since hes in the netherlands lol. But I guess when you compare it to Dubai it's closer. I don't get how or why she's with him when she dumped me over the distance, nand not because I did anything wrong.
I feel guilty, I miss her, it kills me to see her Instagram posts. I find myelf smiling whenever i think of this story and obviously many other beautiful moments i didnt mention because its too long then.. this is long enough. She was my first love and I swear to god I miss her so much, I miss her presence in my life. It fills me swith so much sadness that she found someone to replace me from her old school and in such short amount of time. I wish her the best.
I hope you enjoy my story. How do you feel about my story? From your own experiences does the love ever go. does the pain ever subside? Does the dumper also stop loving? Thank you so much if you've read the most honest and heartfelt post I've ever decided to write. Thank you.

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